guess hu's back...

back again........ finally... lyke dunnoe after so long i got on blog... man its tiring... juz started job... been lyke 3 wks oready... currently on mi foundation programme so i gt no shift... morning shift all the way n sat 7 to 11 n sundays mi off... mi last off on 17 th july.. aftr that shift liao... haiz... learnt alot of things n still gt alot of things to learn.. so happy finally someone taught mi exactly wat i can do n wat i must noe.. n the orientation by a staff naz... thanks to her. reali... i gt transferre to 64 surgical.. during prcp i was in 64 renal... its so long since i went surgical posting so im lyke no nuts... going crazy cuz i can hv all kinda cases n i hv to noe how to care fer them... but right now fer first 3 mths im doin junior job.. hehe but getting staff nurse pay.. ain't it fun or wat....but well everyday come back so tired that i juz knock out after mi bath n meal everyday.. macam no life... like as if i hv 1 animore... mi frens are gonna start work oready.. n i hv 1 missing fren hu can't b bothered to kol which is praticali driving mi insane....never felt this lonely before... hv u eva had so much of frens bt yet feel so lonely....like there's no one fer you??that's how im feeling... i can't get rid of this feeling... so i pratically slp alot if not go out.... felt so stressed n depressed that wen i gt mi pay the 1st ting i did was to shop n shop... felt damn good to finally shop again...n mi fon bill in lyke 11mths was lower than ever... shockin... mi frens now y....y is life like that?? its like i get to b happy n juz wen im happy it suddenly taken away...n like i dunnoe if i ever get it back.. ever lost a thing u like so much n can't fin it.. the feeling can drive u nuts... mi exact feeling....haiz...i wish i could hv a wish so i can wish wat i wanna wish.. can i get a wish??haiz... rite now i hv no life... work frm to mon to fri n come hme n bathe n slp... boring.. i noe.. sat after work come home bathe n go church.. if mi fren free go out if not rot at home again.. the same goes fer sunday....i wld hv a life if someone jus kold....how long im gonna b like this? wen im gonna b happy again n wen the 'test' ends... only GOD KNOWS...